My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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