My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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