My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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