My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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