My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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