My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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