My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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