My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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