My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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