My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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