My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

"Many hands make light work."
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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