My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.

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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.

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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.

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