My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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