My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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