My pastor, he ate too many beans.

He had in his own pews.

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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.

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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.

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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".

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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit

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