Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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