Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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