Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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