Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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