Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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