Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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