Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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