Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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