Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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