Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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