Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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