Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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