Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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