Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.

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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.

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