Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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