Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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