Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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