Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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