Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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