Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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