Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.

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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.

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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs

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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.


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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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