Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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