Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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When do you go on red and stop on green?

When you are eating a watermelon.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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