Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.

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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!

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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.

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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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