So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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