So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison

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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me

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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.

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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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