So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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