So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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