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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,
it was Wedgie Kray.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.
Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
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What did the picture say to the wall?
I've been framed!
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?
Stuck
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?
Do you want to grab a bite?
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?
One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?
Lunch and dinner.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?
Bison
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What do you give a lemon in distress?
Lemonade.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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