So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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