So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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