So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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