So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.

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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.

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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.

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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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