So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.

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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.

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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.

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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.

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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?

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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.

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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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