So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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