So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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