So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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