So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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How much does a hipster weigh?

An instagram.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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