So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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How many pre-med students does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: One to change the bulb and four to pull the ladder out from under him/her.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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