So the Pillsbury Doughboy's pants fell off and I..

feel really weird about donuts right now.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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