Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.

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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.

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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.

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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.

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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.

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