Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis

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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.

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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.

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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.

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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.

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