Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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