Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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