That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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