That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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