The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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When should you buy a bird?

When it's going cheep!

Did you hear the one about the crow and the telephone pole?
He wanted to make a long distance caw.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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