The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras

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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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