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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.
She was wearing massive gloves.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?
You crack me up!
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?
Because he was feeling crumby.
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:
They are triplets.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?
Snowflakes.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50
Senator.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,
I was amazed, I never knew they worked.
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