The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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