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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.
She was wearing massive gloves.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?
A robber ducky.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?
A brick layer!
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?
With its sparrowchute.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?
Do you want to grab a bite?
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?
You can unscrew a light bulb.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?
Answer: The back of his head.
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