The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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