The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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