The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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