The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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