The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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