The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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