The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
Canvas not available.

or


What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

Canvas not available.

or


What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
Canvas not available.

or


I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

Canvas not available.

or


What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
Canvas not available.

or


What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

Canvas not available.

or


When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
Canvas not available.

or


You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


Canvas not available.

or


What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
Canvas not available.

or


Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
Canvas not available.

or






© Copyright crapjoke.com 2017-2026