The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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