The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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