There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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