There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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