There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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