There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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