There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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