There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What did the rug say to the floor?

Don't move, I've got you covered.
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