There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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