There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.


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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.

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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink

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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.

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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.

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