There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.

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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!

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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.

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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!

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