There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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