There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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