There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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