There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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