There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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