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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"
and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,
but I don't want one of them for my husband".
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.
It’s Hans free.
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?
The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?
Because he's Haydn.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
To get to the other side.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?
One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?
The banana split
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What is Claustrophobia?
The fear of Santa Claus.
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