There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What has a bed that you can't sleep in?

A river.

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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison

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