There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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