There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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