There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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