There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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