There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.

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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.

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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.

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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.

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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.

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