There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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