There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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