There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.

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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.

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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!

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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.

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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow

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