There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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