There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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