They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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