They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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