They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
Canvas not available.

or


What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
Canvas not available.

or


How many astronomers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Astronomers prefer the dark.
Canvas not available.

or


A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

Canvas not available.

or


What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
Canvas not available.

or


What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
Canvas not available.

or


Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
Canvas not available.

or


Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
Canvas not available.

or






© Copyright crapjoke.com 2017-2026