This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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