Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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