Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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