Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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