Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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