Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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