Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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