Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake

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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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How many efficiency experts does it take to replace a light bulb?

None. Efficiency experts replace only dark bulbs.

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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.

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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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