Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!

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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."

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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?

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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.

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