Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do you call a slow skier?

A slopepoke!
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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