Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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