Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.

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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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