Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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How many chiropractors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but it takes six visits.

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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.

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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!

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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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