Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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Why did the man take a pencil to bed?

Because he wanted to draw the curtains!
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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