Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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