Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to screw it most of the way in and the other to give it a surprise twist at the end.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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