Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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