Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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