Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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