Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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