Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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