Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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