Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What do you call a smiling, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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