Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.

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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.

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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.

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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .

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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"

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