Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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