Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!

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I went down the local supermarket, I said, "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it",

he said, "Those are pickled onions".

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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.

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