Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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