Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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How many socialists does it take to change a light bulb?

One to petition the Ministry of Light for a bulb, 50 to establish the state production quota, 200 militia to force the factory unions to allow production of the bulb, and one to surreptitiously dial an "800" number to order an American light bulb.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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