Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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