Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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How do Eskimos make their beds?

With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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