Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How many orgy attenders does it take to change a lightbulb?

As many as possible, and don't *ask* what they do with the old bulb.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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