Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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