What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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