What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is happy when the case is closed

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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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