What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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