What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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