What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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