What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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