What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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