What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.

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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?

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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas

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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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