What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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