What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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