What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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