What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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