What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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