What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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