What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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How many managers does it take to change a light bulb?

Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What did the ghost say to the other ghost?

Do you believe in humans?
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