What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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