What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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