What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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