What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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