What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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Why did the baseball player bring a rope to the game?

Because he wanted to tie the score!
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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