What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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A seal walks into a club...
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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