What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...

Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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