What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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