What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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