What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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