What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?

They both come in tots.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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