What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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