What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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