What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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