What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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