What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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