What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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