What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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