What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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