What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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