What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What do you call a sad bird?

A bluebird!
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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How many WASPs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Silly, WASPs don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.
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