What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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