What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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