What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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