What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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