What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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