What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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