What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What is the world's longest punctuation mark?

The hundred yard dash.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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