What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?

They stamp their feet.
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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