What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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