What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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