What country makes you shiver?

Chile.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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