What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in mud, then cross the road again?

He was a dirty double crosser!

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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark

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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!

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