What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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