What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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