What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!

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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.

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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?

In sundae school.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.

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