What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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