What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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