What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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