What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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