What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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