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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?
A spelling bee!
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What did the pencil say to the paper?
I dot my i's on you!
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?
None, because they were copycats
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing
but you accidentally say Mother.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
To get to the other side.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?
"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?
There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?
Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."
The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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