What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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