What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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