What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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