What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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How many agnostics does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Agnostics question whether electricity really exists.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What do you call a calf after it's six months old?

Seven months old.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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