What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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