What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What's green and flies as fast as a speeding bullet?

Super Pickle!
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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