What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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