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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?
Some day my prints will come.
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Where do you learn to make banana splits?
In sundae school.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?
Decalfinated
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50
Senator.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?
A Flat Miner
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Why was the piano player arrested?
Because he got into treble with the cops
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I just watched a program about beavers.
It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.
The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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Name four men that are in a rock group together but none of them sing nor play music...
Mt Rushmore. They're a rock group.. it's a rock...group
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