What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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