What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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How many Christian Scientists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None, but it takes at least one to sit and pray for the old one to go back on.
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