What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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