What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Bill Gates will just redefine Darkness® as the industry standard.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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