What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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