What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986

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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.

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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.

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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.


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I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'.

So I went - and I got it.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.

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