What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What do you get if you cross an elephant and a kangaroo?

Big holes all over Australia!
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